Final Departure
by MeriGo-round
Summary: What if Usopp had never made it to the Sunny during the departure of the Straw Hats from Water 7? Frustration, blame, denial and a member falling behind. The crew will soon be facing the consequences of the structures of their family changing. Rated M for language as well as violence and adult themes in later chapters.
1. Chapter 1

Soo, with Happiness Punch finished I finally have to time to start on this idea that I've been wanting to write for a while now. I don't really know if I'm any good at writing angst, but I'm eager to try it out, because I simply love the genre. And since I only started writing a little while ago, I want to experiment and figure out my skills. So please tell me what you think!

There is going to be a considerable focus on Luffy and Nami here due to the story line that I have in mind, you may or may not call it LuNa, but it will probably be a little off from 'romantic'.

You'll have to know the Water7 arch to understand the concept of the story. Although after the first chapter everything will pretty much be my own invention. One Piece of course is not my invention, but this you already know ;)

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Chapter 1: Departure

He felt his legs wobble, then they finally gave out, leaving him on his knees in front of the broken stone stairs. He wanted to refuse to believe his eyes, even when that scene was so openly displayed before him.

"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?!"

He shouted from the top of his lungs - yet the only ears that his voice could reach were the ones of the people surrounding him, staring at him with confusion or worse... compassion. To the ones he was trying to reach so desperately though, his question would remain unheard.

This had been supposed to be a great day; The day of the great Captain Usopp's return! Finally he had worked up the courage to talk to them, have everyone forget what happened between them and sail the seas as their Nakama once again. And yet there they were, far off in the distance, with a new ship and a new crew member

... and without him.

Usopp felt anger arise within him. They couldn't be serious! He knew that he had screwed up, he knew that better than anyone! Duelling Luffy had been the worst stupidity in his life! But hadn't they fought together after all of that? Hadn't they faced their enemy side by side, having each other's back without a doubt? When Luffy commanded him to shoot down the World Government's flag, he had not hesitated for a single moment, declaring war on the world itself alongside with them. No way they could have already forgotten about all of that!

It wasn't long until the anger inside him shifted, leaving his defenses wide open to an emotion that tore away the ground from underneath his feet: Despair. He couldn't have known that they would already leave... but they knew. They knew and yet not one of them had come for him - because they had long made their decision.

The voices of the people around him, whispering and _gossiping_ about his misery, his being left behind by the people that he loved most in this world, blended into one vague noise in Usopp's ears. That ship in the distance began to blur as he felt water running down his cheeks freely to drip onto his hands that were fruitlessly trying to seize the stone ground, trying to provide him with any kind of hold as his reality began to spin at the realisation that his days as a Straw Hat Pirate were incontestably over.

o-o-o

**"Protect the ship!" **Luffy yelled out, bouncing off cannonballs from his inflated body.

He hated this, he hated everything about this! Usopp for leaving their crew in the first place, Zoro for forcing him to wait, his Jii-chan for driving them away from this island before their time. He cursed every single cannonball that exploded in the water, causing surges that pushed them out to the open sea even faster and further away from his missing Nakama. Everything seemed to be in such hurry to make them leave! He cursed Usopp for not showing up. He cursed himself for putting on a show...

**"He's here!" **

Luffy tried to ignore the little reindeer's cries as best as he could. When he had first heard those words, he couldn't have described the immense hope that it had stirred inside him. Yet, the younger one's claims had proven to have no ground; Usopp was nowhere to be seen. And soon that high-pitched voice, insisting to know otherwise, tugged considerably at the young pirate captain's already strained nerves.

**"He's here!"**

He felt vexed, exhausted, deceived, adrenaline rushing through his system from both, standing against his granpa and the potential loss of his best friend... it was a dangerous mix.

**"Luffy, stop ignoring me! He's here!" **the little one's voice rang through the noise of cannonballs exploding or clashing with steel and the water's surface.

It was the fact that this time he was being addressed directly that made Luffy snap. Angrily he spun around to his little doctor, a cannonball that he had just caught spinning with him and being flung at the ship's mast instead of back out to the sea. The collision caused a violent explosion, sending the weaker crew members to the wooden floor and making their ears ring painfully. Luffy couldn't even tell anymore if that had been an accident, or him unleashing his frustration.

**"Stop saying that, we're not going back!" **he finally bawled at Chopper, ignoring Franky's shouts about demolishing his ship. The younger one looked up at his angry captain, wide-eyed and trembling.

**"Temee... what the hell do you think you're doing shitty rubber man!" **

Luffy turned around, ready to defend himself against the fuming cook stomping up to him. His arm struck out when Sanji's leg flew up to connect with his head... but both of them paused mid-air as more than one surprised scream pierced their ears.

"LUFFY! DON'T THINK YOU CAN ESCAPE THAT EASILY!"

It was his granpa's voice that carried over the water, giving point to his words by lifting one enormous cannonball over his head. Luffy felt his heart drop. He was right, there was no fucking way they would survive that thing! If it hit them, they were done for! The young pirate spun around desperate. Where the hell was Franky?! He was the only one who would possibly know how to move the ship away from the attack! It was his ship after all, so why was he nowhere to be found?!

Like a solar eclipse a shadow devoured the ship as the gigantic iron ball rushed down from above. It was too late! Luffy could only stare up in shock, not even noting the ominous tremble underneath his feet.

Then suddenly he felt himself losing his balance, as the deck beneath him abruptly shot forward while his own inert body didn't. He tumbled across wooden planks for a second, the world around him spinning until his back connected with the gallery door, knocking the wind out of his lungs. Luffy heard the pained groans of the people not made of rubber crashing into the wall next to him, apart from Sanji, who crashed into _him_ and Robin and Nami who had been caught mid-air by a net made of hands.

Quickly Luffy shoved Sanji off him, rushing to the side of the ship to see what the hell had happened, when the impact of the flying ship hitting the water almost knocked the young pirate over the rail. He scrambled back to his feet.

**"What the fuck is going on?!"** Luffy shouted out angrily. It was then that Franky finally reappeared, his head popping up from the engine room.

"My Coup de Burst!" the shipwright explained proudly. "I included the technique in the ship's mechanics, so we can catapult ourselves out of any trouble!"

Luffy spun back around to look over the rail wide-eyed. He was right, they had been shot away a good bit from where the huge cannonball was crashing into the empty waters. The impact followed by an impressive wave that rocked the ship fiercely as it carried them off even further.

They had made it. They had escaped from his Jii-chan...

...they had left Water7...

Luffy looked at the island in the distance, his hands clutching into the rail before him as the Marine ship gave up the chase and the earlier battle field around him seemed to quiet down painfully. There were no cheerful cries celebrating their successful escape, or shouts of farewell to all the new friends that they had made. Only the crushing silence of seven people avoiding to voice out the final goodbye that they had just taken from one of their own.

o-o-o

Luffy was sitting on the wooden floor, staring out at the vast sea behind them. He didn't know how long it had been, but finally he was witnessing the last outlines of Water7 vanishing at the horizon. His heart clenched; They had breached the point of no return at last. At the Grand Line, with it's unpredictable weather and currents, there was no hope of finding back an island that wasn't at least at sight. Luffy may not be a navigator, yet he did understand that much. He thought of the Log Pose, guiding them to an island where Usopp wasn't waiting and the uncharacteristically strong wind pushing into their sails mercilessly. It seemed to him as if the whole damn world was eager to express its approval of them parting ways... The only thing to prove him wrong were the gentle sobs of a young woman and a little reindeer reaching his ears as they were carried by the wind.


	2. Chapter 2

Thanks to those who have shown their support on this story! It doesn't seem to spark a lot of interest yet, but I'm still hoping that will change ;)

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Chapter 2: Just brushing it off

**"Chopper, let's fish!"** a cheerful voice rang throughout the ship.

Immediately the little reindeer tensed, his body acting on reflex on what he knew was going to follow. He winced when he felt fingers tangle up in his fur and he was abruptly being pulled in to soon bump into his captain who was already sitting on the rail. He plopped down by Luffy's side.

"We're out of food again! And I thought things would get better with the aquarium! Shishishi"

Chopper looked up at the grinning boy who shoved a fishing rod at his hooves enthusiastically. Quietly he gave Luffy a nod and a small smile, before directing his gaze at the sea. He just couldn't bear seeing Luffy like that, but of course there was no way he could tell him that.

How could he tell him that every time Luffy joked around, he had to force himself to laugh feignedly while his heart was truly aching, missing Usopp's infectious laugh that would always spark a cheerful mood so naturally. Or that he flinched every time Luffy began to speak, breaking a silence that Chopper had never even known before; Always had there been an endless string of incredible stories just streaming from the sharpshooters mouth, keeping the amazed reindeer's attention. And how he had to fight his animalistic instincts, keeping him alarmed against his will for the absurd possibility that his captain could be a potential threat... No, he could not tell him any of that...

...and so they fished.

o-o-o

Nami stepped out of the galley door, lazily looking over at the two figures sitting on the rail.

_Fishing again, huh?_

Truthfully, it pained her every time she saw the two like that. She remembered the first time Luffy had made Chopper do this; The anxiety had been written all over the poor little reindeer. She had seen all of it: The cautious scootches away, the tears gathering in the corners of Chopper's eyes, the little hic-ups when he tried to bite back those tears. Soon enough the pained, little animal had crumbled, leaving Luffy behind. Motionless. Silent.

And yet there had been a next time very soon... and just like so often nowadays Luffy had behaved like nothing had happened. Nami looked over at Chopper. Every other day the little guy had to put up with this fishing routine now; And ever since that first time he'd always sit through it bravely. _His smile almost doesn't look fake anymore _Nami thought, an openly sad smile tugging at her own lips for a moment.

At times she wondered why it had to be fishing of all things. It was one of those things they had always done the three of them. And yet Luffy was always trying so hard to pretend that this was normality - although sometimes she came to doubt that he was just _pretending_; Sometimes it seemed to her that he actually believed his own act; Sometimes she caught herself believing it, too... And every time Nami was met with that impression, it was accompanied by a memory that had brought her nightmares during the past weeks.

That day when Luffy had been sitting on the aft deck, staring out at Water7, and she had been trying so hard to muffle her own sobs. Every torturous minute that the crew had been waiting for him to show any reaction, to maybe decide that they'd have to go back. Soon the island's silhouette had vanished at last, along with her tears escaping against her will. And finally Luffy had reacted...

She remembered him pushing himself up, casually brushing some dust off his jeans. He would place one hand on his hat, then turn around, not directing his eyes to any of them.

"Yosh!"

That's what he said as he walked past them, making his way to Sunny's figurehead; Soon declaring that spot, directed to what lay_ ahead_ of them_,_ his special place once again.

The memory caused Nami to feel sorrow every time. 'Yosh'. It was something to be said when commencing an action. Or when ending one... She had never really figured out which one Luffy had intended to express. All that she knew was that right there and then their captain had flipped a switch.

Nami shook her head. She didn't want to think of this again. She had come out here to take her mind off of things after all, well knowing that when she sprawled herself on her sun lounger, everyone would just leave her be... and for once there wouldn't be people trying to foster mindless conversations about things so casual and unimportant, they literally screamed of what they were _not_ talking about.

"We'll catch a Sea King today, I can feel it!"

- Conversations just like that one. Luffy's declaration was soon followed by a hearty laugh. Nami used to enjoy that laugh so much... now she just found it obnoxious. Hurriedly the young woman made to stride away, her mess of feelings taking notably from her attention. She didn't even have a chance to react when suddenly she lost her footing, making her hit the floor painfully face-first.

"Shit!" Nami wailed, as she scrambled to her hands and knees, her eyes stinging with unfallen tears. It wasn't so much the pain, yet frustration now truly got a hold of her, just as forceful and unexpected as the impact itself. Shakily she lifted one hand to wipe her eyes, but abruptly stopped when she beheld that it was pitch black! Nami straightened up now though still on her knees, incredulously looking down her body that was covered in thick, black mud... Then the realisation hit her; And finally those tears fully escaped the overwhelmed girl, running messy, skin coloured paths through the black dirt covering her cheeks.

All those past weeks there still had been all that gun powder, coating the charred main mast and planks.

- And last night it had rained...

"Nami, are you alright?" Chopper hurried to the girl's side.

She clenched her stained fists, allowing frustration to morph into anger now.

**"Dammit, dammit, dammit!" **the girl cried out, making the baby reindeer jump as she began punching the slick, coal ground. She paused, then Nami pushed herself to her feet, wordlessly shoving the intimidated animal aside as she marched off.

Chopper slumped down, then cringed when Nami slammed the galley door behind her. For a moment he looked after her sadly - and for the first time since all of this had started, he actually longed to be sitting by Luffy's side fishing, pretending that everything was normal and indulging in his captain's cheerful attitude. He turned around, confirming that luckily Luffy hadn't moved from his spot. Quickly Chopper picked up himself as well as his fishing rod, before hopping back onto the rail and putting on his happiest, almost untainted smile.

"Catching a Sea King sure would be great!" the little pirate hurriedly tried to rejoice... then quickly quieted down when he looked up at his captain who had fallen umcomfortingly silent, his features concealed underneath his hat as he hardly even acknowledge the littler one's presence.

o-o-o

Nami let the bucket drop onto the deck, water splashing up over the rim and onto the charred ground. Her fists clutched the brush tightly as she got to her knees and began scrubbing the smudgy planks with all the passion of an openly irrational, personal vendetta. She simply found it incomprehensible how after all this time there could still be that much fucking gun powder left! It was surreal! It was stuck to their ship like a virus... often reminding her of some kind of twisted, sable memorial, looming from the very core of what was supposed to be their space. And Nami was done remembering, she was done hurting, she was just done!

Minutes of agonizingly frustrating scrubbing seemed to do nothing but smearing the foul dirt around, having it infest everything in reach with that sickening black. Her hands, the brush, the foam on the deck and the water in the bucket. With the back of her hand Nami brushed away some hair, smearing the substance over her already stained face, before she got up to splash the remaining water over the wooden planks, hoping to wash as much of the dark filth overboard as possible.

o-o-o

She stared at the mucky stream running down the planks as she emptied the bucket for the sixth time. Nami felt her back ache and her hands sting, already blistered and sore and more and more there was the impression creeping on her that there wouldn't be enough water on the ship nor flesh on her hands to ever eliminate this nauseating blackness.

With a loud clatter the young woman threw the empty bucket to the ground, then finally reached down to the belt that kept her Climate Tact attached to her left thigh. Maybe there wasn't much she could do about her hands... but she was prepared to go down to the bone if necessary, because at any rate she was not going to run out of water!

Nami slid the three metal pipes out of their belt, spinning them in her hands as a dark cloud began to form over her head. Soon single droplets started hitting the ground as well as her skin sporadically, before growing into a full stream of rain pouring down, rinsing whatever black would come off the girl and the ship without applying soap and a brush.

When the cloud was fully grown, Nami stopped the movement of her hands to look down on the utensil she was holding, rain soaking the mikan-coloured hair and running down her form as she was quickly losing herself in thought. The past weeks ran through her mind... all those encounters with enemies that constantly seemed to be getting stronger the closer they got to what they called the 'New World'. Her hand clasped around the Climate Tact tightly as she thought of her talk with Usopp just before Alabasta. Back then, when she had first noticed her strength failing her, he had been the only one she had been able to turn to, being the only other person who understood what it meant travelling as a normal human among those 'monsters'. That's why he had made the Climate Tact for her; And truly it was what had enabled her to keep up with the crew for so long at all. Still, lately she had struggled. And it was becoming more and more evident now that soon her only real weapon wouldn't hold up anymore against what Luffy and the rest were actually _excited_ to fight.

Nami's felt her hands starting to shake with anxiety. She had already lost the only person that could truly relate to her... and she felt she was about to lose her only defense along with him, making it possible that she was soon going to be the hindrance that Usopp had thought he was when he first left.

The water kept pouring down, rinsing the deck steadily as Nami resumed scrubbing the floor, her hands trembling as tears secretly mingled with rain drops. She was shaken a bit when suddenly she heard the slam of a door, yet there was no need for the girl to look up to know what sight she'd be met with: Chopper on the rail, seizing the fishing rod firmly as he was torn between staying strong and breaking – and Luffy gone.


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry for uploading this chapter_ again_... to those of you who are following the story this must already feel like spam O.o Somehow there must have been a problem with the sever or something so this chapter kept crashing -.- I've waited some time before re-upping it this time, so I hope the problem will be solved by now.**

This chapter uses some Japanese vocabulary. I'm sure that most of you will understand most of it, but here's a few connotations anyway:

An ofuro is the Japanese version of a bath tub. In Japan it's common to sit down on a stool and wash your body squeaky clean before entering the tub though. The later soak is basically just for relaxation.

"Chigau" literally means "different" or "unlike" but is often used to express that someone is wrong. I purposely chose this word, because the ambiguous meaning grasps the later situation so perfectly.

Hope you enjoy and of course thanks to all those lovely people that support this story ;)

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Chapter 3: Coming and going

Nami ground her teeth together as she slid into the ofuro, trying to bite away the burning sensation of heated water against the open flesh on her hands. She cursed at the feeling for a minute, but then the pain finally started to wear down, diluted by how her body was conforming to the temperature and adjusting to the sensation of the warmth against her wounds. Her clothes were still a mess; And so were the tiles of the bathroom from when she had rinsed the remaining black off her body earlier... but she was not a mess. And the deck outside wasn't - and it made it all worth it! Nami started to relax as the warmth began easing her muscles and she inhaled the scent of the water's herbs.

There was a gentle knock on the door followed by a voice that woke the young navigator from the soothing atmosphere of her bath.

"Cook-San asked me to tell you that dinner will be ready soon."

"Thanks Robin" Nami replied politely. "I'll be out in a minute."

"No need to rush. He wanted you to know early so you could take your time getting ready" the voice informed her through the door. The girl slid a bit further into the tub, seizing the offer to enjoy the warm water for another minute.

"I will, thanks" she hummed before listening to foot steps leaving.

o-o-o

Dinner was it's usual mess. Everyone was trying to defend their food as best as they could as Luffy gobbled away from everyone's plates, sometimes trying to ninja some snacks unnoticed with a rubbery arm, sometimes launching for direct attack. In the general chaos it was hardly even noticable how the boy almost carefully avoided just that one plate in front the green haired swordsman, who never really spoke a word at the table anymore. But there wasn't a need for anyone to notice really, since everyone present already knew and had long gotten used to this act that always remained unmentioned.

Zoro was hardly being seen anymore at all, spending most of his time in the crow's nest that was basically the size of a lounge now. Even the temptation of taking a nap in the sun hadn't been enough to draw the swordsman out to the deck anymore and so far no one had had the nerves or the interest to go and object to his general absence. In the end dinner was the only time when he was still showing himself at all, for what reason no one really knew. Almost everyone had heard the story of Zoro and Luffy's first encounter at least once, rising the reasonable suspicion that the stubborn man was most certainly not driven by hunger and Nami had soon found herself stuck with two theories: Either he didn't want to pass on the nutrition since he was most likely training all this time or maybe at some point Sanji had simply _insisted_. If that was the case though, it was for only the two to know and no one to find out.

Nami hissed a little in pain as she tried to arrange the chop sticks between her fingers, soon rising some unwelcome attention.

"Nami-San, what happened to your beautiful hands?" the reaction followed instantly.

Quickly she shot the worried blond a scorching glance, clearly telling him **'don't!' **without a single word being uttered. The last thing Nami needed right now was for that self-proclaimed cavalier to start a big fuss over this, turning this thing that she had worked so hard to get rid of into a prominent matter once again. All that she really wanted was to preserve that perfect feeling from when she had been soaking in the tub, indulging in how all of this was finally gone.

"It's nothing. I'll have Chopper take a look at it after dinner" she tried to remark casually, yet the sudden change of atmosphere was almost tangible as two people at the table grew considerably uncomfortable at this conversation.

Nami already knew that she would have to apologise to the little doctor later. Her frustration had gotten the better of her and the rather shy animal certainly had enough to cope with already – The girl felt quite differently about her captain though. Somehow she couldn't fight the notion that, if he felt guilty or even suffered a bit from this whole situation, it truly was well-deserved! He had been the cause for all of this after all; And even though Nami wasn't quite conscious of this, deep inside she knew that with "all of this" she was truly referring to so much more than just some dirt on the ship.

"You know, Franky, the deck is mostly clean from gun powder now..." the young woman picked up the topic one last time, feeling a little content when she saw Luffy tense in the corner of her eye "...but big parts of the wood are charred. Could you fine down those planks later?"

The shipwright looked up from his plate a little surprised, but quickly replied, visibly happy about the request.

"Sure thing, little Lady!"

"Arigatou!" Nami hummed before getting back to dinner, realising very well that she would now have her share all to herself.

o-o-o

When Franky had joined the crew, he sure would have expected things to be different. He didn't quite get why that little guy who has had so much love for their former ship hadn't come with them. Back in Franky's secret lair Usopp had told him about leaving the crew himself, but after all they had been through, surely that couldn't still be the reason. And every time he tried to find out something more, the cyborg was pretty much being stone-walled. At some point he had asked Robin about the matter, since clearly she was the most level-headed member of the crew, unfortunately she couldn't quite help him on all the details though, having missed out on most of the happenings herself. She had filled him in on the quarrel at the Galley-La which was – at least that's what Franky thought – about an awful lot of bullshit in the light of leaving a family member behind... but surely it wasn't his place to speak. Because even when it had felt a whole lot different back in Enies Lobby, Franky had soon started to feel like he didn't really know these people at all; And until now no one had seemed to be making an effort to change that.

When dinner was over, the shipwright got to the task at hand right away, relieved that the weather had been nice today and there would still be enough light for another one or two hours of work. After seeing Chopper, Nami had quickly gone to bed explaining how truly beat she was, but even if she wouldn't get to see the outcome tonight, Franky was eager to fulfill her request. He honestly was glad to have been given some purpose other than the obvious repairing-damage-after-hostile-encounter for once and that he could finally do the crew a somewhat more personal favour. He fined down the charred wood with care to soon reach the soothing oak colour beneath and for a moment Franky came to think that maybe, just maybe, he would soon get the chance to finally be sailing with those people that he had seen fight so fiercely for the well-being of their Nakama.

And maybe it was just the right time for that little surprise he still had up his sleeve to help him with that.

o-o-o

Nami stretched her arms over her head, well knowing that she had slept in late, but she could feel that the ship was already sailing and since no one had come to disturb her, the sea must have been quiet for now. She let her arms slump back down and with one of her bandaged hands the young woman carefully stroked over the palm of the other, noting how it already felt a lot less sensitive. Choppers ointments could truly work miracles, plus the herbs from the ofuro's water had already done their share of salving the pain before. As she slid out of her bed, her muscles still felt rather sore, even when her hands didn't... That little cleaning fit had really taken a toll on the girl's body, which was probably the reason that she was still in bed at all. Obviously though, when a ship was sailing, at some point the directions of a navigator would certainly be needed, so Nami reluctantly proceeded to get dressed to finally make her way out to the deck.

When the young navigator stepped out of the door, she was welcomed by the warm breeze of a late morning as everything outside seemed to be just normal. There were Luffy and Chopper, fishing again since they had abandoned the task before catching something the day before. There was Robin, reading a book and Sanji bringing her some coffee. Franky was carrying a barrel to the engine room and Zoro was nowhere to be seen – which was pretty much normality in itself. Nami took in the scene before her, shivering as she was suddenly overcome with an unnerving feeling. With everything being so normal, why did all of this seem so utterly wrong?

The girl let her gaze wander once again before finally her eyes stuck with the sight of the main mast, standing tall in it's full splendour. She took a hesitant step forward, then made her way over to the spot quickly, crouching down to stroke over the soft surface incredulously as she realised that Franky had already gotten to work. And he had done one hell of a job! She couldn't even tell that the planks had been treated; And now the only thing that spoke of what this place had looked like just the day before, were the bandages around her fingers, lingering on the wooden ground...

This is what she had wanted... No more black; No more reminders; No more burned remains of that accursed departure! She herself had asked Franky for this...

...and Nami genuinely hated herself for feeling this disturbing sadness all of a sudden, tugging at every fiber of her being when she had thought she'd be relieved.

**"Land, ho!" **

Luffy's voice tore the girl from her growing dismay. Quickly she wiped her eyes, before looking up just in time to see the excited boy rush past her, soon balancing on Sunny's figurehead, one hand raised to shield his eyes from the sun.

**"An island, it's an island!"** she heard Luffy sing as he spun back around.** "Na, Chopper! We can go hunt for real meat there, and for adventure!" **

It was Franky who first reacted to their captain's excited shouts, heaving the barrel from his shoulder to set it down.

**"Oi, Mugiwara!" **he caught the boy's attention. "If we're close to an island, there's something I've been wanting to show you!" The shipwright soon gestured for everyone to follow and the crew looked at each other questioningly, before one after another they climbed down the pegs of that hatch that Franky had vanished in, soon finding themselves in a small hall surrounded by gates that counted zero to four in big, red numbers.

"The Dock System?" Sanji finally remarked. "Didn't you say that apart from the paddles it was still empty?"

"That's right, I did" the cyborg replied proudly. "I haven't told you about this one yet, because it's a present!"

**"A present?!" **

It was easy to tell that Luffy's interest had been sparked, the boy hopping from one leg to another impatiently as he demanded the promised surprise.

"Show us! Hayaku, hayaku!"

Franky didn't wait to comply and pushed gate 2 open, slowly revealing a familiar face, smiling at the crew from a little steam boat. There was a moment of silence as everyone tried to grasp just what they were looking at

"MERRY!" Luffy and Chopper finally cried out in unison before their reactions took different turns.

Luffy bounced at the miniature Merry immediately, happily hugging the figurehead's long neck before starting to investigate the whole little boat excitedly. His reaction quickly brought a touched smile onto Robin's face. Right away she had felt happy when she saw this little surprise, yet at first she hadn't been quite sure if that was even appropriate... Sanji's had felt quite the same as Robin, the only difference being that, instead of concentrating on their cheerful captain, his attention had fallen on the little reindeer that now stood still, tears of grief beginning to soak his fur. The blond carefully crouched down a little, padding the baby zoan on the head comfortingly as he maintained a neutral face.

"It's Merry!" Luffy's voice carried through the room. "Look everyone, it's Merry!"

Upon the boy's enthusiastic reaction, Franky quickly began resuming his intentions.

"Now listen, Mugiwara! The Thousand Sunny sure is a great ship that can do everything your former ship could do and more, and it will carry you for a long time... but that little caravel had been very dear to all of you so-"

**"CHIGAU!" **

The angry shout cut Franky off rudely, making everyone turn around in shock to look at the infuriated young woman in the back, her fists clenched and trembling.

**"Chigau! That's not Merry! It's not!" **

Nami couldn't help the tears coming to her eyes as crude anger struck her at the scene unfolding before her. Furious she charged at her captain, clutching her fists into his vest and jogging the startled boy harshly.

**"What are you getting all excited for?! This is nothing to be happy about! Merry is gone!" **

Luffy couldn't think to answer upon looking at the upset girl, his eyes shot wide-open. He saw exasperation carved so deeply into her features; And the pain of making one of his Nakama suffer once again quickly suffocated his voice as well as his coherent thought.

"Chotto, wait a second -" Franky quickly tried to intervene, grabbing the girl's shoulder hesitantly.

As she felt the touch, Nami shoved Luffy violently, making him stumble over the rim of the little boat backwards and crash into the wall of the narrow booth. The boy slid to the ground limply as Nami spun around, jerking away from the shipwright.

**"And you! Do you really think that's all it takes?! A new ship to carry us along and a miniature double? Merry was more than just the shape of her head and the ability to float! Do you really think you could replace someone just by matching their skills?! What do _you_ know of what Merry meant to us?!" **

Franky was the one striken with anger now, his huge hands clasping around Nami's shoulders again, this time without hesitation. He didn't even care to spare attention to their cook's angry shouts regarding his actions towards the girl. It had just become painfully evident to him that she didn't even acknowledge him as part of the crew and if that was the case, there truly was no reason for him to be here!

**"I know of the lengths you went to for one of your Nakama and of the tears you shed for that little caravel!" **the huge man now shouted, making the girl in his clutch wince frightened.** "I know the look the long-nosed bro had in his eyes when he was speaking of that ship and I've seen the look in his eyes when he understood that there was no saving her! And where the hell were you?!" **

The cyborg quickly released the delicate form as he started to grasp his own words, letting the shaking girl sink to the ground.

"You're probably right..." he spoke more calmly now. "If you were capable of leaving behind a man who had so much affection for that ship, I sure don't understand what it meant to you.**"**


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4: Blindness

Nami sat on her bed, her arms wrapped around her legs as she buried her head in her arms. They had arrived at the shore and anchored at least an hour ago, but Nami didn't feel like exploring the new island... or like facing anyone outside for that matter.

Sanji had knocked on her door once, yet luckily he was enough of a gentleman after all to know when he wasn't wanted around and he had left her in peace since.

Chopper had come by and she even would have considered letting him in, if only to hug the fur ball close and shed all her tears into that comforting softness... judging from his trembling voice though the little animal seemed even more upset than her and surely that was the last thing she needed right now.

Of course Franky had not come to see her.

Luffy hadn't...

There was a knock on the door before Nami recognised Robin's voice.

"Koukaishi-San? Daijoubu?"

She didn't feel like answering. Maybe if she didn't, everyone would just leave her alone.

...

"You could just as well open the door, since I'm already watching you" she heard Robin joke from the other side of the door in her usual, gentle tone.

...

..

"It can't be helped then..." the older woman finally sighed. Nami didn't look up as she listened to a click and then a soft creaking sound.

Robin walked to the younger girl's bed while the hand that had unlocked the door from the inside dissolved into a mist of sakura blossoms. Then she sat down beside her, waiting quietly. For a while Nami just kept still, requiring a moment to adjust to the company. First came little hic-ups, then quiet sobs... and finally the girl uncoiled, lying down on the other woman's lap and sobbing away freely. Robin stroked the mikan-coloured hair comfortingly as she gave her another moment to catch up with her emotions.

"Ara, ara... that's a lot of tears for such a little woman" the dark-haired woman finally spoke, making Nami quiet down a little. Wiping some tears of her cheeks the young navigator just indulged in the comforting company of her Nakama for another moment. And finally she found the strength to speak.

"I just feel so strained all the time..."

"We all do" the older woman replied softly. "Everything's different after all and no one talks about it. Sometimes talking helps though, Nami."

The girl looked up now, feeling a little abashed. She was used to Robin addressing her with her title or at least adding "San"; But there were times like this when she would call her by her name only... and the gesture always gave Nami an odd feeling of consolation. It had something warm to it, something maternal.

She pushed herself off the woman's lap now, rolling over to lie on her back and direct her gaze to the ceiling. Nami wanted to follow her Nakama's cue to try and talk about it, the problem was that she really didn't know what to say though, because truly, she didn't even know what had happened to her back there. Then sometimes there are situations where you only really begin to understand what you're feeling when trying to voice it out, and certainly this was one of those moments.

"I've judged him, you know?" she finally managed to put together. "Luffy I mean... I've judged him for acting like this. Ignoring what has happened and trying to make it go away." Nami raised her hand to cover her eyes as they began filling with tears again. "And yesterday I've done the very same thing, right? Removing that mark from our departure like that. It was the only thing speaking of Luffy's true emotions. I feel like I'm betraying Usopp's memory the way Luffy does."

"I'm sure you know, that that mark is not what composed his memory..." Robin warmly remarked now. "We remember and cherish Sniper-San within ourselves, even when Senchou-San cannot bear to accept that yet... But you know what truly is a devotion to Nagahana-Kun?"

Nami didn't lift her hand from her eyes as she listened to the older woman's explanation, preparing herself to accept whatever she was going to say next. It made her feel ashamed, yet somehow it just seemed to her that Robin had a better insight on her feelings that she really had herself.

"That little boat is" Robin finished at last."And that one is one our captain accepted."

For another moment Nami just stayed still, trying to process the reasoning she had just been offered. Secretly a tear rolled down from underneath her hand before quickly vanishing into the bedding beneath her.

"I've really screwed up, haven't I?" she finally wheezed.

"There is no such thing as behaving wrong in such a difficult situation" her Nakama consoled the girl. "Everyone's trying to cope the best they can, and so are you."

Pushing herself back up to be seated against the wall, Nami let the words sink in. Slowly she pulled her legs close to her chest once again, wrapping her arms around them another time.

"Just how come you're so smart?" she quietly asked, partially joking, partially wondering for real, her knees against her lips muffling her voice slightly. Robin chuckled a little at the question.

"Well, I'd like to think it comes naturally when you're a historian" she finally answered. "People tend to learn from the past."

Nami turned her face to the side at this, her eyes growing heavy with a certain gloom. "A shame then, that some people don't seem to care for the past" she mumbled quietly in response.

Under her hand the young woman felt the Climate Tact strapped to her thigh. A little absently she began to fumble with the object that by now in some way seemed to have become so symbolic for her recent disquiet, even when it was supposed to be the straw that she should be able to cling on to.

"Robin, I..." she began as she felt anxiety preying on her mind another time, just like it had done so often lately.

"What is it?" the dark-haired woman responded with her usual, understanding voice, yet Nami couldn't help but feel the need to back-pedal. She simply wasn't ready talk about those fears just yet. What if talking about it made it...

... real?

"Uun...it's nothing" she responded quickly while putting on a faint smile.

Getting up from the girl's bed now, Robin turned around to smile at her younger Nakama encouragingly. "If that's so, we should get going. Everyone's waiting to set foot on the new island. Should I tell them you're coming, Koukaishi-San?"

"You guys go ahead, I don't think I'm ready, yet" the younger woman replied with a hushed voice. Robin only gave her an understanding nod before she turned around to walk towards the door.

"Oh and Robin..." Nami made her stop one more time. "If Zoro wants to go, tell him not to get lost! We don't know how long it will take for the Log Pose to adapt, so we could lose our course!"

"I don't think he'll go, but if he does, I'll just grow an eye on his behind" the devil fruit user simply joked in response. "That way I'll always know where he is and I can enjoy the view at the same time" she finished amused, winking at Nami before closing the door behind her. The young navigator just looked after the other woman a little puzzled for a moment, soon though she couldn't help but chuckle at that mental image under tear-soaked cheeks.

o-o-o

Everyone put up their hands to shield their eyes from the reflection of the sun. The island that spread before them was truly breath-taking, wholly coated in a lucent white, almost like a winter island that lay before them in the middle of a summer climate. It was the most beautiful sight, the only downside being that the glistening whiteness happened to cause slight snow blindness, which unfortunately was somewhat counterproductive to the stunning visual impression. Yet, the new-found land didn't fail to put the exploring Straw Hats in awe.

Luffy of course was the first one to jump off the deck and dash through the white powered beach, marvelling at the ground that wasn't really sand, but something equal to it and the fact that this white that reminded him of snow actually felt warm. The next one to forget all sorrow for a moment was Chopper. No doubt that it was odd, seeing palm trees covered in white as opposed to pines, yet, he was feeling nostalgic at the sight and considering those past few weeks, this warm feeling inside was truly nice for a change.

"I'm curious to see what kinds of ingredients there are to find on a summer-winter island" Sanji commented where he stood next to Robin, still close to the ship. "I haven't had sufficient supplies to cook something special in days."

The young historian picked up some of the white powder and contemplated the glistening substance in her palm.

"You may have to contain yourself for a little longer" she answered ominously, then she smiled, her face reflecting an air of earnest interest. "Marvellous though, isn't it?"

Not bothering to respond, Sanji lightened himself a smoke. He took a deep breath before exhaling the white fume, watching it dance in the air before him.

"I take it Nami-San isn't coming?" the cook finally asked in a casual tone. Robin just shook her head.

"Franky and Marimo neither."

Unhurriedly Sanji stored away his lighter in his shirt pocket before starting to walk towards the jungle line.

"Oi, you two! Let's go find some food!" the blond yelled on his way, causing Luffy and Chopper to abandon their play and fall in line. The only response Sanji received was an evidently strong appreciation for the 'finding food' part.

They made their way across the white beach wordlessly, when a moment later Robin appeared at Luffy's side, just strolling along. Absently the young woman directed her gaze at the white glistening plants before them as she began to speak in a gentle tone.

"I talked to her before."

It wasn't so much a challenge than rather an invitation, yet, the young woman wasn't surprised, when her captain didn't show any reaction to her words, sternly looking ahead. She had been prepared for the fact that Luffy wouldn't be eager to address the earlier happenings, so obviously Robin was not going to stress the topic. Still, she was sure that somehow he would like to know...

"I think Nami-San will be alright" she finished, knowing to drop the issue at that. However, it was now that Luffy did manage to surprise the young historian when this time he actually turned his head to look at her with a wide grin.

"What are you saying?" the boy replied in a joyful tone. "Of course Nami will be fine. I'm sure she's just tired."

Robin was almost amazed at the amount of denial that lay in this response. Not only in his statement, but that expression and voice as well. If Luffy wasn't actually believing his own words, he truly would be able to shame her own ability of suppressing all visible emotions.

Getting closer to the point that separated sandy beach from thick vegetation, the pirates were met with a surprising realisation. Whereas the white ground was some kind of powder, the white coating on the trees and plants seemed to be more of an _actual_ _coating_. Scrutinising the odd surroundings, Sanji ran a hand over one of the palm trees. He first felt over the even surface before instinctively knocking on it. The substance seemed surprisingly hard but clean, reminding him of a thick layer of glass or something similar at least. Faintly he remembered Robin's suspiciously knowing comment from before and he was just about address the beautiful, young historian, when suddenly a rubbery object bounced him off his feet, causing him to smack against the solid glass-ish tree behind him.

"MEEAAT!" Luffy yelled, as he jumped off into the white thicket, following a rather surprised, little animal on the heel.

**"What the hell, shithead?!"** Sanji shouted after him angrily, his earlier question dying down on his lips.

"Wait Luffy, don't run off alone!" Chopper quickly panicked, chasing off after him before finally Sanji, too, found himself with no other choice but to follow.


End file.
